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Archive for the ‘Danny’ Category

So I am back from my slight blogging hiatus. My apologizes, work has kept me so busy this past week and I’ve not had the chance to sit down and write a good blog that you would enjoy. So now is my chance to get you caught up with everything!

I last left off last Friday. I didn’t have any big plans for Friday except to have dinner then head over to a bar to see a cover band play. But, I did have a date with Cody on Saturday. At that point in time I had been on several dates with both Frank and Cody. But in the grand scheme of things I have done a little more than go on dates and kiss with Frank than Cody. I don’t know why but I had found myself connecting with Frank a little easier than with Cody; that’s not to say Cody isn’t a great guy. So Saturday evening I head out to see “Watchmen” with Cody. I’m going to stop here for a moment to discuss “Watchmen”…I’m trying to decide whether or not to put up a spoiler alert regarding my next few statements?! Here is my warning/spoiler alert…if you like surprise male nudity then skip the next paragraph.

For those of you who have seen “Watchmen” let’s take a moment and discuss the giant, blue, cgi-ed cock in the movie. Talk about surprise male nudity. I am all for more gratuitous male nudity in films…for obvious reasons but I have to say I was a bit surprised Dr. Manhattan’s (Billy Crudup) cgi, blue cock in “Watchmen, “ but I loved it! Apparently it has been nicknamed “the crowd pleaser” LOL. What I don’t understand is how the movie walked away with just an R rating. That cock seemed to be everywhere….I guess you can show your cock and still get an R rating but the minute it is “ready for lift off” an NC-17 rating is appropriate…on yet one more side note…Night Owl II’s ass is super hot too. You can see it again in “Little Children,” what can I say Patrick Wilson has a nice ass 😉

Okay okay where was I…oh yes the date.

So the movie ends and we go to visit Steve at work then we all head over to the gay bar for some fun and dancing. We had a good time but we were only there for a small amount of time due to how late the movie ran and Steve closing up work. But there was enough time for a crazy older man (not that kind I like) to stick his hands up my shirt and begin rubbing my belly. I might be easy but not that easy 😉 Fortunately, I was pulled away by Cody. That old man was creepy as hell. 

 After the bar I drove Cody back to his car…and we just hugged. I’m not attracted to him and I didn’t know how to tell him that while I enjoy hanging out with him I don’t foresee us going any further than that.

Sunday is well Sunday and I enjoyed a day to just hangout.  Monday work kept me busy all day then I ran a ton of errands…then Cody and I along with Steve and a few other guys decided to go to the gay bar. It was a good time, I did some dancing chatted with a few guys. The funny thing about being out this Monday night was that Danny (the man engaged to another man who coincidentally tried to lay claim to my ass) was out with his fiancé. He had texted me asking me if I was going out and I said yes and I promptly told him I would love to meet his fiancé. Who I was introduced to and who turned out was lovely. But this didn’t stop Danny from giving me a squeeze while dancing at the bar with everyone. And by squeeze I mean a below the waist squeeze. I didn’t dance to much more with Danny and his fiancé after that. So the night ends and I take Cody back to his car. We hug again; I’m trying to keep my boundaries. I know I’m not attracted to Cody because while I have fun hanging out with him, I’m not physically attracted to him. I know this because over the course of the past week I had several chances to bring him home with me and I didn’t act on it. I think I learned some self restraint…I think being the operative phrase.

So on Tuesday Cody texts me telling me we need to talk. I know where this is going and I eventually get a hold of him. Leading up to the phone call I wanted to be as respectful as possible (hence the no sleeping with Cody rule I imposed on myself) and when we talked he said that he enjoyed hanging out with me but he needed to know where I stood. I told him that I just wanted to be friends and he seemed pretty okay by it. I told him I’d give him a call this weekend and we could hang out.

Now Frank is a different story. Frank, I don’t know why, but I’m attracted to him and enjoy the dates and other things we do together. Coincidentally, I had not seen Frank for a week and on Tuesday we had a date at his place (he was out of town for work). We were to watch “Gosford Park” (which I love also noticed how I said were to watch). I get to his place and we chat about his trip and catch up then next thing I know we are having a naked party. Yah I said it naked party. We have our fun and then we dig into cheese cake that I had brought for us (always a consummate guest…you always bring dessert if a movie and naked party is involved LOL). Then we end up cuddling for a while falling asleep together for a bit.

 It’s amazing the different dynamic I have between Cody and Frank. I’m amazed at how Cody seems to be the kind of guy I should be dating and attracted to but I’m not and Frank is the exact opposite. I just don’t know…but I am having fun. So we will see how it goes…I don’t think it is anything serious with Frank at the moment it’s just fun and enjoyable. But it makes me questions the whole context we operate under in today’s dating world, the need to define what we are doing.

Ever since Carolus Linnaeus created the binomial nomenclature system of identification (a man who tried to describe all the species in the world) we’ve been trying to define everything we do. You can be a sophomore in college, or a 3rd generation American, you can have a Bachelor of Science in Biology or a Bachelor of Arts in Literature, you date boys with black hair and blue eyes, you aren’t dating but have a fuck buddy, you are in a long term monogamous non-sexual relationship etc. It’s exactly what Cody was looking for when we talked on Tuesday. He wanted to define what we were doing. Which I can’t blame him…I too do love to define what I am doing and with whom I’m doing it with. But after maybe 5 dates, 1 kiss, and 3 hugs with Cody we needed to define what we were doing? What is it about defining something that gives us comfort? More importantly what do you do with something that defies definition? Take for instance the Platypus; it’s the only mammal to lay eggs instead of giving birth to live young. (On a side note did you know it is also venomous…yeah I just found that out too). In fact its’ only other relatives it has are extinct and in the fossil record! What do you do with a mutation, something different, a blip that defies a set norm in today society’s idealized view of dating? That is where I’m at with Frank at the moment. Do I attempt to define what we are at this point in time or do I just let it be what it is? When researchers tried to define the platypus they found it to be the single representative in its family and genus. Are we the platypi of the dating world? Does what Frank and I do/have defy definition and does it really matter? There are tangible benefits to defining what we do. We can’t look over the good a definition does. It lets me know if I can go on other dates, it lets Frank know we are exclusively dating each other, definitions set up boundaries and boundaries can be good. Perhaps it isn’t the definition part but the boundary part that freaks me out to some extent. Perhaps I feel that the minute I define what I’m doing and my boundaries are set something or (and I say this hesitantly) someone better will come along and what I once took as good could be better with someone else. Maybe that is the beauty of a non-defined thing with Frank. We can come and go as we please. Then I read that statement I just wrote and think how utterly ridiculous it sounds. How can people, how can I, go through life easing in and out of things/relationships/dates/people without a commitment on my end. But then I think I’m young and still feeling out being gay and being in a gay community and Frank is older than me. Is there a need on my part to tie myself down so young or am I just making excuses because I’m too scared or worse to greedy to be in a relationship? And that’s not saying I should be in a relationship with Frank, for Pete’s sake we’ve only know each other for a month. I wonder what his expectations are regarding me. Is there a reason he hasn’t said anything about the age difference and trying to define what we are? Or is he okay with what we do and just leaving it at that? Or perhaps he wants this to be fun and easy (not easy in that manner ;)) and not have to deal with the tangible pros and cons that come with a definition. Maybe Frank likes my company and what we do and that’s it. I don’t know at the moment if I can answer any of this.

 

 

What I do know is that he is coming over to my place tonight for dinner and perhaps another naked party. I also know that you are probably bored to tears over this post. So I will leave it at that. I will try and post tomorrow before the weekend. I hope you are all doing well!

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I don’t know what I have done to deserve it but my dating life has suddenly taken a turn upwards.  It must have been all the praying to the gay gods last week (Bette Midler, Celine Dion, Cher etc.) 

 

I ended up texting Frank last night and we decided to catch a movie together this evening.  We are going to go see “Fired Up” because what else would a gay man want to see on his first date *Sammy shakes his head*.  I’m pretty pumped and eager to see what Frank has to talk about.  It will nice to be out with him other than being in a gay bar or doing community activism.  Then also on Monday, as I had mentioned, I was receiving text messages from a young man I couldn’t place.  I text him to see who he is and it turns out I mis-programmed his name into my phone and then figured out who he is.  I was out with Steve one night and he was asked to meet the boy he has taken a liking to out at a straight bar…so we go we meet his friend and a bunch of their friends.  One of the guy’s name is Cody.  Cody is gay and we chat some he seems nice.   He’s really tall, black hair etc. eventually the whole group ends up going to eat out later that night and chat.  I end up sitting by Cody and we talk for a bit.  We exchange numbers and I’m thinking he might be nice to go out with a couple of times.  Over the next day I text him but his text messages don’t give off the “I’m interested” feel so I let it go.  It was Cody who was texting me only I had listed his name as Matt in my phone.  Yesterday I texted him to figure out who he was…the explanation came out and it ended with me and him getting drinks on Friday.  At first I didn’t necessarily consider this a date but as soon as we set the time and place I get a call minutes later from Steve asking me if I had a date.  Here it turns out (this is going to be fun when you hear this…I feel like I’m in high school waiting for my next class) Cody told his best friend who coincidentally is Steve’s crushes bother’s fiancé about a date Friday night a la me.  Other than the high school nature of the news movement, the news spread rather quickly and I guess what we are doing Friday night is considered a date.  I would be lying if I said I wasn’t pleased. 

 

This is what I was hoping for when I came out of the closet.  Obviously, there would be drunk nights at the bars but I want something a little more traditional.  I don’t think going on dates and talking with people is an unrealistic standard to have in the gay dating community.  But there was a while where I was thinking two men going out on dates was to much of a standard then BAM three dates in one week.  Let’s hope this luck holds out for a while longer…apparently I must have done something real good because my Karma levels are particularly high this week.  And of course I will keep you all up today on any fun that might happen while out on my date…you know me I like to keep my readers abreast in my fun 😉

 

So I know what you are wondering right now…What happened with Danny?  Well, I ended up texting him yesterday after his boyfriend/fiancé left.  I asked him why he wanted me to texted him after his significant other left and he replied, “to have more time to talk to you.”  So we chatted and I texted him about lunch, he texted that he “wanted me for lunch.”  Brash and then I was intrigued.  I asked him what he was doing he casually mentioned that he was “naked and getting into the shower.”  Well, you can guess how the text messages started going after that…I give you some words that happened to show up in the following texts between Danny and I….hot, wet, soapy, hard, you, things…I think you get my drift.  As our conversation continues on he asks when I get off work he wants to me.  He wants to meet to fool around but he doesn’t say in the text message.  It’s at that point I text back telling him that it wouldn’t be a good idea for us to meet.  He’s engaged and I have far too much respect for him and his boyfriend to do anything.  He concurs, saying that I am right.  So we text a little more cooling down the steamy texts between us and that ends it.  I hope I smothered any improprieties that could have happened between us when I texted Danny back about his fiancé and him and I not meeting.  It isn’t fair to his fiancé.  It’s unfortunate though he was good looking…it’s always the good looking ones that are taken. 

 

So that is about it for now folks.  I’m pretty excited to see what tonight is going to be like.  I will let you know all the juicy details.  I am going predict that I will get at least a kiss tonight…but I’m hoping for a little make out session with Frank…just a little one.

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Last night was like something out of a movie. That is the only thing I can liken last night to. 

 

Well, yesterday I didn’t think Brad would call so I made other plans…far be it from me to wait around for a boy to call…and then it bit me in the ass.  Brad ended up calling.  Which is good to some extent…after some reshuffling of my schedule we decided to meet for drinks at Ruby Tuesday’s, which moved to drinks at another smaller bar, which eventually led to seeing a drag show and dancing at a local gay bar.  (There is more stuff that happened at the gay bar but I’ll revisit that saga when I finish with Brad).  At this point conversation has been flowing very nicely between me and Brad but I get the distinct feeling we are not meant to be more than just friends.  There is something about Brad that I like…he just struck me as being very human…I could tell that he wore his feelings on his sleeve (which it has it’s pros and cons), he always said what was on his mind (again that can be good and or bad), and I kinda liked that about him.  But he was so anxious too.  That was a hard thing to wrap my mind around.  He constantly seemed worried about something, he was always moving around, he joked that he has ADD….I think he does.  But that doesn’t mean he wasn’t nice…it just exhausted me watching him.  The other thing that worried me about Brad is his drinking.  I don’t normally worry or comment on the way people drink but I’ll tell you what watching Brad kind of blew my mind.  Mind you Brad is a big guy he is 6’7” just to give you and idea of his height…he easily dwarfs me and I suspect it takes a few to get him drunk.  But Brad had quite a few, a few to many to drive home on which is why I didn’t get to bed until 4 am today.  It was while I was driving Brad to his car that he told me he wasn’t interested in me in a romantic sense…trust me I wasn’t heartbroken…but he did say he wanted to be friends, that I can deal with.  I will also give him props considering he was man enough to tell me that he wasn’t interested in me.  Much better than being led on which has happened in the past.  From there things began to spiral out of my control.  There was a stop at McDonalds and an hour and a half chat with Brad in my car…more so Brad talking and me sitting there….is this what dating is suppose to be like.  A 6’7” man, drunk, eating McDonalds in my car, talking about his life with no possibility of heavy petting, who said he wasn’t interested in me.  At the moment if dating is like this I am going to need something to numb the whole ordeal of it LOL.   I offer him my couch but he declines and decided to drive home.  I probably shouldn’t have let him go but frankly, there was no possibility of getting his keys off of him and I had to be up at 7 am.  (On a side note he made it home okay he texted once home safe and sound.)  I think it is safe to say that I can count Brad out of the possible pool of husbands, but I will add him to my friend list.  I do appreciate him not trying to make a move on me it was very respectful of him…and all I can think is thank heavens we went on a “date,” if you could call it that, because trust me when you go on dates you learn A LOT about someone.  Okay so now we have the Brad situation in the bag lets revisit some other things that happened last night.

 

First, when I like someone I usually will give them my phone number… per usual but I’ve found that a lot of the time I never get responses back which is fine.  But occasionally there will be a young man that gives me his phone number and that is a nice change of pace.  Well last night I had some guy, I’m pretty sure I  met at a gay bar, text me while out with Brad. (Remember I said when it rains it pours regarding my dating…it only gets better.)  I can’t seem to place the guy at all!!!! I don’t know what to do, I think I’m going to lie and tell him my phone died and that’s why I texted him today instead of last night and then ask how we know each other…it’s all just to weird.  Then I started receiving texts from Frank.  I called him last night regarding a date on Wednesday and his phone was off…he had a concert to attend, so I knew it would be off.  We exchanged texts and he kept calling me stud which is pleasing.  So we are going to see what happens with that.  Then finally I ran into a real nice guy I had given my phone number to some weeks ago.  He never called me back but I’ve seen him out a few times.  Well it turns out Brad knows him so he comes over and we start chatting, (his name is Danny), Danny leans over and apologizes for never calling me…he tells me that he has a boyfriend and that he felt weird calling me and telling me over the phone.  It was a nice gesture of him to do…then he tells me he and his boyfriend had just got engaged.  So basically I hit on a fiancé.  Okay so he’s off the market no biggie, he’s still really nice and I enjoy talking to him.  As the night progresses Brad, Danny, and myself bum around the bar a bit enjoying each others company.  Well at one point a good song comes on.  I liked it, Danny obviously likes it the way he is shaking his hips (his dancing was what initially led to me giving Danny my number) so we end up on the dance floor.  We are dancing having a good time, I keep reminding myself that he has a fiancé, but we are just innocently dancing.  At one point he leans over and whispers in my ear that the night he danced with me (when I gave him my number) he was attracted to me but he had a boyfriend, which pleases me that he was attracted to me…the next thing I know his hands are on my ass.  Do I pull away, no, because that would be the right thing to do and I want figure  out how fast it would take for a rumor of me sleeping with an engaged guy to circulate in the gay community and eventually get back to his bf/fiancé.  He pulls me close and presses my hips against his.  He keeps grabbing my ass and eventually I pitch a tent promptly jabbing him in his thigh.  He keeps making faces of contentment.  Eventually, the ass groping tent pitching fest ends and I get ready to leave…and by leave I mean drive Brad back to his car.  We exchange goodbyes and Danny plants a big kiss on my lips…a lingering one that hints at something more.  A few minutes later, against my better judgment I text him thank you for the dances, he says he’s welcome and that he will text me tomorrow (which is now today) once his bf is gone.  This is nothing, NOTHING but trouble.  All I know is that while I am wildly attracted to Danny, I could never do anything with him and when we text today I plan on making that adequately clear….I’m a lot of things but a home wrecker is not one of them.

 

So that was my Monday night.  I apologize for the mess of a post but I am exhausted and frankly anxious about everything today.  Like I said when it rains it pours…I’m on boy overload…yet none of them seem to be boyfriend material. 

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